So the doctor's office called back this afternoon. He's going to need to see me before he can consider adjusting my meds.
The earliest they can schedule me is in two weeks.
Two weeks?? You might as well tell me two months. Or two years.
Two weeks is too long.
Do you have any idea how much damage I can do in two weeks? Damage to my reputation at work? Damage to my relationships? Damage to my own well being?
Answer: Way. Too. Much.
(as an aside to anyone who may be worrying too much right now - I don't mean any actual physical damage to myself... well, short of what damage I might do to my liver by drinking too heavily and the pounds I would gain from eating too much.... but I don't mean any actual physical harm. If I did, I would be checking myself in somewhere, not calling my PCP. I know enough to know that. But don't think I haven't thought of it... checking myself in that is, not harming myself. The idea of a padded room seems great some days.)
((I'm only half kidding.))
(((about the padded room, that is.)))
So no, two weeks will not work. Try again.
Again, seriously? Do you think I can't do ample damage in one week? Don't try me, cause I know I can.
With a sigh, the receptionist says to me, "well, I shouldn't do this, but, I can put it in as a sick visit and he will see you this friday morning."
It's all I can do to not scream at her: "I am sick! I can't stop crying. I can't sleep. I can't think straight. I can't function at work. I can hardly get out of bed! I ache all over. I HAVE FREAKING MS! And right now? Right now MS is making me it's bitch. It's toying with my brain in a way I am NOT equipped to deal with. So if it makes you feel any better? I will fake a cough and lie about having a fever, but for the love of god, I am sick! What more do I need to say?!?!?"
But instead, I say, "Thank you, I appreciate you doing that."
So now instead of two weeks, it will be two days.
Two. Long. Days.
Someone wake me when this is over, okay?