Friday, June 15, 2012

I should come with a warning label.

This is the time of year that I love/hate. For FB purposes only - otherwise the summer kinda rocks. What, with the extra days off and ample chances to get drunk outside. I'm not such a fan of the humidity, but that's a whole different gripe. 

No, my ongoing frienemy status with this time of year has more to do with my former students. They've graduated. They are no longer my students. I welcome them to my FB world. 

Then the waiting game begins. 

You see, I spend every waking moment at work being as professional as I can manage. We all know this isn't as professional as most, but it's clearly not vodka-at-11am, vaguely raunchy/suggestive blunt cards, and fucking-cock-shit-balls kind of language. And, well, my FB is. 

The problem is, my FB is my real life. Not that FB *is* real life, but my posts truly are my thoughts and anything that amuses me? gets posted. I'm kinda easily amused. So I post a lot. It's my outlet to offset all the times I do have to pretend to be grown up. Trouble is, these former-students often think I *am* grown up. 

They are grossly mistaken. 

What happens when they land on my page? Well, I rarely know, actually. I think, for some - well, probably most - it's a shock, to say the least, that their adult-school-counterparts are 1. real people and 2. sometimes vulgar. Okay, a lot of times vulgar. For me, at least.  

But today I got this message, from a former student: "Mrs. Witzel, uhhh, I gotta say that from a guidance counselor the statuses I've seen are pretty damn funny. I'm glad I friended you."

Now, I'm pretty sure I can take this as confirmation of a few things: 

1. I am the most awesome guidance counselor ever. 

2. At least some of my statuses wouldn't actually be as funny if I *wasn't* pretending to be a grown up in my waking/working hours. I can live with this. 

3. It's okay to let your former students see that you're a real person. Some of them may even like you all the better for it. 

However, I do understand that not everyone will. But, that's real life. You're not going to like everyone, y'all. And if someone doesn't like who I am in "real life" (ie. my uncensored, vodka-swilling, self) then they should unfriend me ASAP. Like, seriously. In fact, maybe I should put that as a disclaimer somewhere because really? I wouldn't take offense. I'd actually totally understand. 

See how I just turned that into a muthafuckin life lesson? 

Best. counselor. EVER.  

(and I'll drink to that.)

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